tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20361191919131874232024-03-18T23:59:12.587-04:00Dr. Jeanne & Ms. Hildedr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comBlogger43125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-17292470536046087712013-02-14T00:00:00.000-05:002013-02-14T00:00:03.424-05:00Date Fail #1Although I'm a cynic to all things romantic, I decided I needed to branch out and do some dating. So I went on a date with Bashful.<br />
<br />
Bashful's a good guy. He fits every little girl's checklist. And he'd make any momma very happy indeed.<br />
<br />
Bashful took me to the zoo. A great idea except he was so quiet and didn't make any conversation except to mimic the noises the animals were making. Seriously. I don't understand "ooo ooo ahh ah". Is that monkey for "what are your passions in life"?<br />
<br />
At dinner, the waitress looked between me and Bashful asking, "Together or separate?" He whispered, "I'll pay."<br />
I really don't think the waitress was going to bit him or anything.<br />
<br />
While I ate my swiss and mushroom burger with gusto, Bashful barely picked at his food. "Aren't you hungry?" I asked as I reached for my Coke. He poked a french fry with his fork but didn't look up.<br />
"Not really."<br />
I scrunch my eyebrows together thinking about how hungry I had been from walking throughout the zoo. I felt my eyes widen as a thought hit me. "Don't tell me that you're too nervous to eat!"<br />
He still didn't look at me. I decided not to push the issue.<br />
<br />
I pried words from him by asking him tons of questions. I found out that he owns a hedgehog named Mike, believes that traveling is walking from his bedroom to the living room, and that he lives in a glorified shack in his parents' backyard.<br />
<br />
Yeah, he sounds like a keeper. I'll just need to erase "long talks on the beach" from my list of must-haves.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-91568240428518320362013-01-25T00:00:00.000-05:002013-01-25T00:00:11.877-05:00Break-up Survival KitA dear friend of mine recently went through a break-up. Now, we all know how painful break-ups can be. The loss of this special other person feels like the loss of your dreams for the future. Or sometimes you just can't get over how you were stupid enough not to see his/her faults.<br />
<br />
Anyway, it's rough.<br />
<br />
So I came up with The Break-up Survival Kit!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoMiKJcLby0tvq53CAoLeiZJRBr6fi3CvtkmSmr9OWUYP5nXIDdj88cz9lPD6XwbNe7Bf9HcPaQodsMwxwWnu1nCmGBLJI3x6CXxWHiDOa2MuaKfy42V7NdpdDUZwESmnryQWYzKyBXPsA/s1600/basket.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="150" width="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoMiKJcLby0tvq53CAoLeiZJRBr6fi3CvtkmSmr9OWUYP5nXIDdj88cz9lPD6XwbNe7Bf9HcPaQodsMwxwWnu1nCmGBLJI3x6CXxWHiDOa2MuaKfy42V7NdpdDUZwESmnryQWYzKyBXPsA/s200/basket.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Obviously, you need to tailor your kit for your friend. But this one is for my friend. The coolest thing was that it cost me about $7.<br />
<br />
When I began this process of kit-building, I asked myself, "What does a person need when they're dealing with a break up?"<br />
<br />
Chocolate.<br />
And I did better than just a bar of chocolate. I chose Dove Chocolate. Why? Because each wrapper has a positive sentiment written on it. Chocolate and words are good for the soul.<br />
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When I was at the dollar store looking for a pretty basket, I discovered this fun coca cola glass and I thought, "Why not? It makes drinking water even fun!" I ended up dumping the Dove chocolates into the glass, wrapping a strip of newspaper around the glass, and then sealing it with a blue pipe cleaner.<br />
But here's the glass!<br />
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Right before I was going to check out, my eyes snagged on the Valentine's (I have future plans of making some friends a Valentine package). And I saw these wack-a-Valentine. Yeah, you smack it, shake it, and throw it on the floor. A chemical reaction is supposed to occur inside that blows up a small balloon (I tried one and it needs a lot of shaking and smacking).<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj0C1uYhnIxi4jDGyG6rcvSwcQ49VJVFr7erjZxH-KCe8a7nUdYOIE1Nj4vx7r1cKVXYQhnGySU1yICS2YUqO1p7-jWoLrxcz4FNP7puEvKUiaFp_11mAYvHBWwEMlFS_EI8HiNCXlieQg/s1600/wackavalentine.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="150" width="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj0C1uYhnIxi4jDGyG6rcvSwcQ49VJVFr7erjZxH-KCe8a7nUdYOIE1Nj4vx7r1cKVXYQhnGySU1yICS2YUqO1p7-jWoLrxcz4FNP7puEvKUiaFp_11mAYvHBWwEMlFS_EI8HiNCXlieQg/s200/wackavalentine.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Cards are a must in my book so I made this one.<br />
"When life is crappy..."<br />
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And here's the inside!<br />
"It's okay to cry."<br />
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Sitting on my bed with all these new purchases spread about me, I thought that I should open my junk drawer and look for tape. I also found this which totally had to go into the kit!<br />
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I mean who wouldn't want a nerf gun?!<br />
<br />
I also found some pipe cleaners which I twisted into flowers. Then I decided that I should finish my kit off with a little list.<br />
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And what more, I cajoled two friends into helping me get the kit to the friend dealing with the breakup. Tonight, she'll walk into her room to find this kit waiting for her!<br />
<br />
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Have you ever made a surprise package for a friend? What was the reason? Do you have a no-fail package that you make for people?dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-88923830983765986672012-11-03T20:33:00.000-04:002012-11-03T20:33:53.816-04:00Dilettante of Serial DatingDear Dr. Jeanne,<br />
<br />
I've done something rather rash. I've signed up for a dating website called okcupid. It's free. I figured, "why not?"<br />
<br />
Anyway, I'm troubled because a lot of my friends think I've gone off the deep end. Really, I think I'm looking for amusement and meeting new people. Do you think that's bad? <br />
<br />
Also, I'm struggling with self-respect. I always thought that online dating was sketch. But now I'm doing it. Do you think that's okay?<br />
<br />
Thanks,<br />
a dilettante in serial dating<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<i>My Dear Dilettante,<br />
<br />
Don't bother with those who think you've gone off the deep end! Sure, they have wisdom and care deeply for you; however, this is a new chance to grow and try new things. Be wise, but be daring! Why cower in fear?<br />
<br />
I want you to be able to respect yourself! Think deeply about what's making you feel this lack of self-respect. Is it simply the fear of what others think? That's normal, but don't let it influence your level of self-respect! You are a strong, surely beautiful, and confidant woman--worth the time of others!<br />
<br />
Here's to adventure!<br />
Dr. Jeanne</i>dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-34316641577182541502012-07-15T15:56:00.000-04:002012-07-15T15:56:22.571-04:00Whiskey Sour"you're afraid of love"<br />
<br />
That's what the scarlet-shirted man at the bar said to me. I shrugged and took a swig of my whiskey sour. <i>Who was he to say that anyway?</i><br />
<br />
When his drink was set before him, he grabbed it and moved to the other single woman at the bar slyly propositioning her. She threw her blonde highlighted hair back and laughed drawing her electric blue nails across the ice dew on her glass. <i>She's captivatingly fearless.</i><br />
<br />
I stared down into my drink. Given a couple more of these and I'm sure I could be that flirtatious. "Doubtful. You'd just be a messy drunk."<br />
<br />
"Did you say something, Angel?" The big cowboy to my left asked. He'd already downed quite a few drafts, but he seemed no worse for the wear.<br />
<br />
I began to shrug; then decided to confess. "See that man in the scarlet shirt, he asked me to sleep with him, and when I refused, he said, 'You're afraid of love.'"<br />
<br />
The cowboy stopped mid-gulp and turned to fully look at me. My cheeks flushed warmth as I became spotlighted in his blue-eyed gaze. He looked at my empty glass. "Sweet Pea, can I buy you another drink? It'll take the edge off."<br />
<br />
"One whiskey sour is my limit. A ginger ale would be fine, though." I scratched my nose and pushed my straight red hair behind a ear. Cowboy seemed nice, toned, and twice the man that scarlet-shirted man was. "Do you think he was right?"<br />
<br />
Cowboy waved the bar tender over and ordered a ginger ale for me. He picked up his draft and took a gulp. "From my experience, love and sex do not equate. You can have great sex and no love for the other person."<br />
<br />
It was my turn to take a gulp of my ginger ale. The liquid fizzed down my throat. "Okay, so you're saying that dude equates love and sex? So I shouldn't be feeling offended at his comment."<br />
<br />
"Exactly." Cowboy raised his glass to mine, and we clinked glasses. I smiled.<br />
<br />
<br />dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-81177914127668977892012-06-09T16:28:00.003-04:002012-06-09T16:28:41.606-04:00Intimidated Mensomeone explain to me why headstrong and confident women are so intimidating to men.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-35834945960408812032012-03-31T17:47:00.000-04:002012-03-31T17:47:50.895-04:00"good morning"Why in the world do people wish each other "good morning"? It makes no sense. Honestly, it's not like we don't know it's morning--after all, morning came to us by either a nagging mother or a yelling alarm clock. Not pleasant. So don't you wish me a good morning! Anyway, I know it's morning so let's quit with the obvious.<br />
<br />
sheesh.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-88508559218906162732012-02-21T11:52:00.002-05:002012-02-21T11:52:23.197-05:00If love is so great, why does it hurt so much?dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-12276135063826651462011-11-01T23:29:00.001-04:002011-11-01T23:29:33.768-04:00If I fell in love with you, would you promise to be true?dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-47027027042718723802011-10-18T22:50:00.000-04:002011-10-18T22:50:53.990-04:00a letter & responseDear Dr. Jeanne,<br />
<br />
I have decided there must be something wrong with me. Not a single boy has ever liked me nor have I ever had a boyfriend. I must have a third ear or nostril that I've never noticed before. <br />
<br />
I have never had a boyfriend. There must be something wrong with me. You'd think by age 20, I would have had one. Nope. I'm as single as ever. <br />
<br />
An oddball,<br />
Ivy Thorpe<br />
<br />
****<br />
<br />
My Dear Ivy Thorpe, <br />
<br />
Surely, there is nothing wrong with you. In this day and age, spinster-hood is rarely reached. People are both dating earlier and later. You happen to be one of those later-daters. Don't worry, hun. If you do have a third ear, I'm sure your someday-boyfriend will enjoy whispering secrets into it. And if you have a third nostril, you'll be able to enjoy this man's scent all the more. <br />
<br />
Never fear. You aren't that strange. I didn't date till I was 25. And people might have considered me a spinster. Anyway, some boys are slower in the whole pursuit of women than others.<br />
<br />
Go buy yourself a milkshake and smile.<br />
<br />
With love,<br />
Dr. Jeannedr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-8109400691936191972011-10-09T14:40:00.000-04:002011-10-09T14:40:19.359-04:00Weddings and ElopementsOne of my dear nieces eloped three days ago. She and her boyfriend had been going steady for a year or maybe it was two years. We all knew marriage bells were in the future. We just did not realize that it would be elopement. <br />
<br />
Apparently, she stumbled upon this information. I suppose we'll have a family party for her once she and her husband return.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://d30opm7hsgivgh.cloudfront.net/upload/172060985_gUWj29z3_c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="1233" width="453" src="http://d30opm7hsgivgh.cloudfront.net/upload/172060985_gUWj29z3_c.jpg" /></a></div><br />
<a href="http://www.costofwedding.com/">via</a><br />
<br />
Blessings on your marriage, dear.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-11409690659362545732011-09-25T18:41:00.000-04:002011-09-25T18:41:37.442-04:00a word from Ms. Hildepeople like sweet.<br />
i'm not that.<br />
...<br />
probably why i'm not married/engaged/dating<br />
...<br />
i got ice princess down pretty well.<br />
i specialize in this facade.<br />
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/></a></div><a href="http://vi.sualize.us/beuchampniven/woman%20with%20tea/">via</a>dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-59047320330632343502011-09-25T18:37:00.000-04:002011-09-25T18:37:25.448-04:00is it just me or is it getting hotter in here? <br />
one more friend married.<br />
one more friend engaged.<br />
they're dropping like flies.<br />
(who ever came up with that phrase anyways? why don't we say...they're pairing up like the animals in Noah's ark...they're disappearing like tasty candies...meh. they're dropping like flies)dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-22863351913211532702011-09-09T00:31:00.001-04:002011-09-09T00:31:27.342-04:00Learning to LoveBetter to err in faith than to err in fear.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-70253120586793342362011-08-26T23:56:00.002-04:002011-08-26T23:56:17.252-04:00On couple loveI just love to watch couples together. They are just so sweet. Watching how he strokes her back and how she giggles up in his face.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-31426579082083238322011-08-20T00:12:00.002-04:002011-08-20T00:12:34.061-04:00i fell out of a window and hit my head.<br />
the headache hasn't left me<br />
this must be love.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-69971927050756927532011-07-06T17:13:00.000-04:002011-07-06T17:13:18.788-04:00gotta love those good-intentioned-meddlers<br />
who<br />
think that you must want to be married<br />
(any single man of large fortune must be in want of a wife)<br />
after all, marriage is bliss (right?)<br />
so<br />
do you want to come hang out <br />
on Thursday night?<br />
There are a lot of really good guys (and gals, of course)<br />
<br />
oh. cool.<br />
i have - um - golf lessons during that time.<br />
but (no) thanks.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-2598366598747665672011-06-29T10:17:00.002-04:002011-06-29T10:17:25.490-04:00a room full of engineers is worse than a group of old gossipy womendr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-73009689358376354922011-06-15T13:30:00.000-04:002011-06-15T13:30:05.363-04:00Wig ModelingThis old guy tells me I'm <b>brain dead</b>.<br />
<i>Me: ?????excuse me?????</i> <i>you are joking, right? RIGHT?</i><br />
<br />
Then, he compliments my hair because it covers my lack of brain activity.<br />
<i>Me: ??????<br />
</i><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
And now, I'm left at a loss of how to interact with the male species. My stellar responses to this man's insult/compliment only validate his claim. Suh-weet. Maybe I'll take up wig modeling since I need good hair to cover up the deadness of my brain.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-46830525731093427452011-06-01T13:48:00.000-04:002011-06-01T13:48:36.347-04:00Man AppreciationI like men, I'll admit. They've got some pretty cool things going for them. Here's a list that I've compiled in honor of some men in my life.<br />
<br />
1. Muscles – They’re nice to look at, but I can appreciate them so much better when they’re in action (I like them even better when they’re helping me).<br />
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2. A Strong chin – We can only really enjoy this if you actually take the time to shave.<br />
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3. Chivalry – I can get the door myself; yet, it’s so much better if you make a point to get it even before I’ve considered the fact that I need to go through that door. This goes for other things, too (“Let me take those heavy bags for you. Oh, they’re not heavy? Let me take them anyway.”)<br />
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4. “Wait, that’s your sister?! (you treat her so well that I know that you’d treat your girlfriend even better. Sign me up!)”<br />
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5. Intentionality – Choose one girl and pursue her. Don’t go playing with every available heart. Nothing burns like the anger of a woman (or many women).<br />
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6. A Man who cries – You get more man points for this because we don’t doubt your manhood. I appreciate a man who can be real.<br />
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7. Cleanliness – I love a man who takes care of himself. It shows someone who’s serious about all realms of life. Also, the smell of such a man is real nice. I’ll stand near to him.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-16464811552936941492011-05-23T16:48:00.000-04:002011-05-23T16:48:26.156-04:00<a href="http://smorgasbordom.blogspot.com/2011/05/short-story-summer-love.html">Love is unexpected.</a>dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-85500611335761797532011-04-26T21:39:00.000-04:002011-04-26T21:39:54.226-04:00Teen RomanceTeenagers. <br />
They always think they've found their true love within the first five minutes of setting eyes on a strapping (or should I say scrawny) young man. He walks into the cafeteria abdominal muscles tight and arms bulging. Teenage girl swoons as he walks past. The girl has just fallen in love with his ego.<br />
Beautiful.<br />
Usually, I hate spring. I hate it with all the budding flowers and the cutesy little couples coming out from the wood work. Where did they all come from? The girls staring into the guys' eyes trying to find themselves.<br />
<i>Well, guess what, Honey! You won't be finding any of yourself in his eyes! He'll be to busy looking at his own reflection in your eyes. Nothing for you there.</i><br />
<br />
Teenage love. Puke in my mouth. Bane of my Spring and scorn of my winter. They can just go make goo-goo eyes at each other through sunglasses and they can go slobber on each other at Niagara Falls (I think that equates about how much drool occurs).<br />
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Of course, if you are some lame-o and you like that kind of cutesy thing, you should probably enter <a href="http://smorgasbordom.blogspot.com/2011/04/ask-author-giveaway.html">this giveaway</a> for a free copy of <i><a href="http://rhondabrutt.com/">Voyance</a></i>, a teen fiction novel.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-34470486176683635172011-04-23T10:15:00.000-04:002011-04-23T10:15:53.876-04:00Love is...I'm a photography nut. I could sit for hours and look at photography of all kinds. Please take a moment and look at this blog post themed <b><a href="http://www.alexbeadonphotography.com/blog/2011/04/15/find-out-what-love-is/">LOVE</a></b>.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-32154616899495311402011-04-11T00:52:00.000-04:002011-04-11T00:52:03.672-04:00A Series of LettersEnclosed: A note from my niece.<br />
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Dear Aunt Jeanne,<br />
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I was so excited about the coming Spring weather. Today was our first warm day. I loved it. Like others girls, I chose a skirt from my closet and wore flip flops. Sitting in the greening grass and enjoying the sunshine on my skin made me so happy.<br />
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Then, tonight, I went on a walk by myself. I should have known better. Spring nights are for couples. I ran into them everywhere. It seemed as though I couldn't go anywhere without meeting one. I'm sure they didn't really notice me, but I sure saw them.<br />
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Aunt Jeanne, singleness sucks. <br />
<br />
.....<br />
<br />
Dearest Niece,<br />
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I hope you still find Spring delightful. I know that I spent the day preparing my garden for the blooming season. One of my daffodils burst its little bright head up. You know, how I love gardening. <br />
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Anyways, dear heart, I want to remind you that singleness can be wonderful because it means that many opportunities are open to you. It also means you can flirt with anyone you so desire. Spring nights alone can be just as satisfying as with a significant other. Anyways, I'm sure you know all of this already.<br />
<br />
Your loving aunt,<br />
Dr. Jeannedr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-36338195801085827652011-04-09T17:40:00.000-04:002011-04-09T17:40:52.781-04:00Kissssssssssssing<blockquote>A Kiss is a Commitment.<br />
It alludes to a final surrender.</blockquote><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.trademarkia.com/logo-images/hershey-chocolate--confectionery-corporation/a-kiss-for-you-hersheys-kisses-milk-chocolate-85127898.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="140" width="206" src="http://www.trademarkia.com/logo-images/hershey-chocolate--confectionery-corporation/a-kiss-for-you-hersheys-kisses-milk-chocolate-85127898.jpg" /></a></div><blockquote><a href="http://www.trademarkia.com/a-kiss-for-you-hersheys-kisses-milk-chocolate-85127898.html">via</a></blockquote>dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2036119191913187423.post-76296415869367791442011-04-02T16:15:00.000-04:002011-04-02T16:15:52.969-04:00ExerciseWhile I race around chucking stones at geese and missing horribly, a couple canoodles nearby watching as "that poor single girl" chases geese.<br />
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For your information -- oh, canoodling couple -- I will keep my goose-chasing-days.dr3am3rhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13180061943340517074noreply@blogger.com